The Land of The Brave

We had a great wrap up show for the IRP6 case series. Yolanda is a magnificent woman; you can hear the W
dignity on her voice. She was poised and to the point, sure of what she was saying, safe and measured in her words.

Yolanda talked about her son and her husband with such self-assurance, such self-control. You could hear in the back of her voice, like an after taste, that she is hurt, but you didn’t hear her say it. You could feel that there are sleepless nights in her eyes, worrying about her family, her husband, her son Kyle’s health and emotional wellbeing, but she kept her composure through the whole interview, just pointing out her situation; but mostly talking about her husband, her son and her faith in God that all this ordeal will be over one day, that they will be together and happy one day, not too far from now. She was really vocal, and very intent on letting us all know that her son is a normal young man, with interests and activities proper of his age. He just has a trouble with seizures, an issue quite common with growing boys, which is usually outgrown by the time they reach adulthood. Unfortunately, in Kyle’s case, he had a terrible stressor starting at the age of 14, when his father started being unjustly investigated. That issue, together with the normal worries and stresses associated with growing up, have made the situation stretch till the present day, as Kyle is prone to have seizures circa his visitations to his father. It seems to be totally unfair that he looses his father when he needs him the most; it is a bad place to be for a young man. At a time where he should be learning to be a man from his father, he is dreading the time that he can spend with him. The stress caused by having to see him in prison is too much for Kyle to be able to stand with a calm spirit, his joy spoiled by a sickness that has been refueled by his family’s present situation. What a shame, a young man suffering emotionally, psychologically, and physically in such a way, and to such intensity that his body is rebelling and loosing control over the situation. Kyle is calm apparently, always with a smile on his face, but somehow his stress comes out and manifests itself as seizures.

As with the other cases, we were left with a bittersweet taste in our mouths. We are impressed with these women’s fortitude and with these children resilience, but is all this pain really necessary? All this trouble could be relieved with a case review, with a second look at the evidence and a fair trial, in which all information is transparent and clear procedures. Would it make more sense to straighten out this terrible mess?

All this has been hard to report, but very rewarding; an injustice after another; women left behind, children suffering and abandoned. A system that is failing us all, not just the families involved in the IRP6 case. These children are the future of this country and these women are the mentors that educate them. When we allow injustice to prevail in a society we allow for corruption and ultimately we allow for degradation and shame.

Are we to stand quiet when the future of this country is compromised? We have heard terrible stories these past episodes, we have grinded our teeth, grieved and cried with these women, but what I felt the most is a sense of loss. A sense that we are loosing our humanity when we allow for injustice to go on; when we allow women and children to suffer needlessly; when we look at the pain of others with indifference. Are we really the land of the brave?

To get additional information and another point of view, visit Danica’s blog at


It Could Happen To You Too

What kind of world are we living in when we allow injustice to hit the basic unit of our society? When we beautiful womenallow our families to be damaged by improper handling of unfairness? What kind of people are we to call ourselves civilized when we don’t take care of our own, let them go in to disgrace and don’t look back?

The IRP6 case is a fine example of this problem. Here we have 6 families destroyed by bureaucratic failure. By human error or negligence, I really don’t know, but the result is that this families are going through trying times and nobody is helping them. Yes, of course, their circle, friends and church members are supportive, but society is not. No major networks are making waves; no bureaucratic entity is supporting them and listening to their crying. And worst of all, most of us think that this is not our problem, we are not involved in this mess, how could we have something to do with it? Mostly, what can we do if bigger and better people are doing nothing about it? That is a terrible problem in society today, even worse than the injustice going on. The fact is that in today’s society we are so individualistic, so egotistic that unless a problem directly affects us, we want nothing to do with it.

Men being convicted unjustly bring a lot of issues to the table, to our society and truly affect each and every one of us. Not only the men get imprisoned, so do their families. Women and children are left behind, still free to come and go, but only relatively. They don’t have the right to be with their loved one, they don’t have the right to keep the team they started when they got married, they don’t have the right to have the financial and emotional support they were counting on when they decided to have a life in common with these men.

The whole family suffers a loss; they all get affected by this judgment in more ways than one. Las week we talked with Tasha Harper about what was happening to her children, how all this is affecting them and how they cope with the loss, and that is hard enough. But children are not the only ones getting affected. The whole family’s  life changes, the relationships, the values, quality time, priorities. The men are loosing the best years of their lives behind bars, and they don’t really know why, they didn’t do anything; their wives are loosing their lives while looking at them suffer, missing them, feeling the pain and the brunt of reality, suffering themselves as much as if they were imprisoned, if not more, as their situation is aggravated by abandonment and loneliness.

The wives go home to an empty living room, to sad and troubled children, to a life of financial hardships. They are the only breadwinners now, with no child support and no widow pension. They are left hanging in limbo, being punished for being, for something that neither them nor their husband’s did, doing a sentence for a crime that is not committed, or even defined. They are paying for injustice and that is all;, they are paying for us all; for all of us turning our backs on their reality, for all society living a life of disinterest to our fellow men and women. It is time that we stand up for one another, that we denounce injustice. We have a voice and we have to use it. We cannot look at this problem and decide that it is nothing to us; it can happen to all of us. No matter what we stand in life right now, it can change really fast.

To tell us about how her life was affected by the changes brought about through terrible events we have invited Tesia Barnes, Married to Kendrick Barnes, another one of the IRP6 wrongly convicted men. Please join us on giving Tesia a very warm welcome, being a quiet woman, Tesia is making a big effort to come and talk to us about her experience, and we truly appreciate her willingness to share with us her testimony.

We will be on air, Tuesday September 24th, at 8 PM PST

For more information also visit

Making the Best Out of It

What makes some people be able to live through terrible situations and make the best out of it? 1216121440aMost of us will go through pain and grief in our lifetime. Loss of a loved one, a serious illness, hardships and financial loss will reach every one of us at one point or another. Whatever the situation is, as we grow old, we all have one or many reasons to experience grief and to mourn. And we are all conditioned by society and evolution to deal with pain in more or less the same fashion.

Most human beings will go through 4 of the 5 stages of loss, not all with the same intensity or in the same fashion, but we will experience denial, anger, bargaining and depression. The 5th one, acceptance is reserved for some, but not all of us. Some times death reaches us before we are able to accept that we will die, or sometimes we will get stuck in one of the previous stages, not allowing for a healthy healing.

When we get stuck and don’t allow for the next stage to arrive, or when we go repeatedly back and forth in between stage, we develop PTSD, that very prevalent disease that was first identified to recognize the changes in mood and terrible experiences, that in many cases last for a lifetime, which affected WWII veterans.

Doctors evaluated certain traits, as deep depression, flashbacks, and nightmares that would not go away. Feeling sorry for oneself and having a monothematic conversation, usually centered in one’s loss is what we commonly see it represented as. All the symptoms of PTSD are normal and are part of the healing process. What makes it a horrible disease is that the individual is not able to keep going, to let the grief develop and the energy flow

We know today that not only veterans acquire PTSD. Many people, and specially women, will develop the disease when they go through highly traumatic events. But not everyone will. Some individuals are able to, no matter how traumatized they are, recover, pick up the pieces and get going with their lives. What makes this individuals able to cope when others end up destroying whatever is left of their lives by drinking, doing drugs, or sleeping in to a terrible depression that will not allow them to have a fulfilling life ever again, or at least for a long time? What makes some individuals more suited to pick up the pieces and go?

Why me? And the immediate answer is why not? What makes me better than anybody else that is going thought the same things I have endured, and in many cases worse times? To me that is the break point, when we finally realize that we are not the center of the world, ad that other people hurt as much as we do if not more. Now we can start working with ourselves, Now we can get busy and use the three magical attitudes, gratitude, compassion and hope

Gratitude for being here, for having the insight, for having the problem so we can learn from it…

Compassion for yourself, for others, for the situation, for the world that we live…

Hope that it will get better, that we will learn from our situation, that we will be an example to others…

All these take us to action, to taking a proactive attitude and to get out of our head and in to doing something, whether it is to fix the problem at hand if possible or to cut our losses and make the best of the hand that life has dealt us. Right at this point we stop feeling sorry for ourselves and we realize that we are responsible for what has happened, although not at fault, and we take charge of our lives. We are not the victim any more. Instead we are the heroes of our own story, and whatever may happen we are victorious, as we have learned our lesson and we can moved on.

Please join Catherine and I for a discussion on how we deal with grief and getting back on your feet. Or dial (347) 637-3317 I hope to see you there


Enriching and Getting Enriched

We had our second show, and it is getting very exciting.  Our numbers are getting higher. We are

Looking beautiful in a harsh world

Looking beautiful in a harsh world

getting an audience and we had a caller, although we could not talk to the person, as there was no sound. Maybe they had their phone on mute. But never the less it was an exciting moment and it made a difference. We want all of you to call and participate, we want to hear what you have to say, what your opinions are, and what topics you would like to hear us talk about with you.

Catherine and I had fun, like always that we get together. We are so different and I think that that is one of the reasons why we click. We can learn so much from each other. Catherine likes to color coordinate and accessorize, I am your casual woman, dressed up when needed, but comfortable in jeans and shirts. She loves her make up and nails done, I wear a washed faced with natural oils to moisturize; but in our own ways we are both feminine, we look at the world from the eyes of woman, and we are both very driven and ambitions in our goals, still in a very feminine way.

We came to different conclusions about what we feel what being feminine is, but somehow we have come around and seen the other’s point of view. This show definitely gave me some pointers one how to be more organized and efficient in my life.

We finally got to the conclusion that being empathic makes our job a little bit harder and the lives of others around us a little bit easier in this masculine ridden world.

It is a lot healthier and fulfilling to us women to be in tune with our vibration, in touch with our instinct.  If we are willing to make a compromise, if we make the effort to be true to ourselves, we will have the power to change the world, one of us at the time.

The world is going through a lot of changes, and I believe that femininity is getting past due recognition. There are more men and woman recognizing the power of female, the energy of nurture. Take a leap and explore your inner self, it is time to take control of who we are.

If you didn’t get a chance to listen to our show, please feel free to go back and listen to the archive of the show:


Next coming show, scheduled for Tuesday July 19, 2013, we will be talking about picking up the pieces after a fall, getting up and getting going. We hope you join us and celebrate your femininity by taking action and making a conscious effort to change your little corner of the world.

On Being Feminine

We all want to be feminine, but are we? 1017522_481324855288917_209918415_n

As little girls we liked dolls, an indication that we are maternal, and pink bows and to look pretty so we can be admired and told that we are nice and wonderful. Girls just like to be sweet and soft, we like to be nice.  We are vulnerable and we like to be taken care of. We like our man, whether it is father, boyfriend or husband to be ready and help us, we like to give love and nurture, and most of all we like to care and empathize.

But what does it mean to be feminine?

I today’s society it isn’t very easy to be feminine. We are brought up to like all feminine things. We are told that we are sugar and spice and everything nice, but we live in a go-getter masculine world. By the time we reach sexual maturity we are all confused. We have been told that caring is for losers, that if we don’t get up and go, we will never make it. We are told that we need a man to take care of us, but we find ourselves competing with men. There are too many contradictions I think, and I also think that we can change that.

I believe that being feminine is actually caring, nurturing and empathic, that we can, and actually should, treat the world in a loving, and sweet manner. We don’t need to be forceful and aggressive. We have our ways.

When a woman loses her compassion, she loses herself. We can be sweet and assertive, and we should.

We evolved to wait in the “cave” making a home while man went out to hunt the bison and mammoth to feed the family. We are to stay around and do our work, light the fire, gather seeds and wait for man to bring us the meat. And I think that here is where the problem lays. We are to let man do their work, not tell them what to do. We are to do our work, not expect man to tell us what to do. But most of all, we don’t have to accept what man, or society for that matter, gives to us. When we stay in our cave we are not waiting for the man, we are making our life. We are not dependent on them, as we know how to gather seeds and roots, and we learn how to sow and harvest. We can take care of ourselves. We can take care of our lives and the lives of others; we can create a home, where there is fire for warmth and safe shelter, so why should we go by the rules of others, by imposed preconceptions of what our lives should be. We are not to accept everything that is given to us. We are to choose if we want what we are offered.

Why do we expect men to ask us to marry them, get on their knees and tell us that they will bring us the world and then we don’t let them? Why do we try to fill masculine roles in society that drive our nature berserk?  By trying to fulfill a role that is not ours we are getting shortchanged and actually very damaged, both emotionally and spiritually.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t believe that women today should stay home and wait for her man to bring home the bacon. I believe that we are plenty capable of bringing it home ourselves, and cook it and clean after ourselves. I believe the by going back to our sweet ways, our compassionate ways, and by allowing time, thinking things through, and slowing down our pace, just like our foremothers did, we will be more in synchronicity with our true nature and we will be able to have and independent and fulfilling role in society. I believe that we can be feminine and strong, that we can be nurturing and successful and that we should be women first and foremost in everything that we do, because it is in our nature and that way we will be most successful in our lives and we will be able to contribute to this world that is forgetting what a helping hand is, and what home really means.

Please Join Catherine and me Tuesday July 16th at a8 PM Pacific Time for our new show, we will love to hear your opinions and concerns

or call 347-637-3317 to join us live from your phone